And I do carry your heart with me.. all of you! I am humbled by all of this - so good to hear from the "moms"..but damn it Shelly - did you have to tell everyone about the green m&m's? To this day I have the boys trained to give me all the green ones whenever they open a package. When I return to Fleet, I will now be expecting this from all of you.
Let me tell you a bit about the "moms". There was a baby boom back in Fleet in the early 80's ..Cedar and Caleb were some of the first to arrive, followed by Nicole,the two Ryans,Jill,The Litendre girls and Rob,Sky,Mia, Rushby, Kai,Max and Kenneth. Most of us did not have family close by so we started to get together once every week for coffee (which quickly and magically turned into champagne), and this went on for years. This was pure bliss for most of us - being a young mother is so tough..and we bonded in a way that only champagne drinkers can - our kids bonded as well(over milk bottles) and to this day they are like brothers and sisters.. one big, extended family. Nothing could stop us from getting together - we gossiped through a storm till it became apparent that it was treacherous- then we all piled into my Izuzu knowing that Rt. 6 was closed due to a blizzard and drove down the highway following the nearly invisible telephone poles to make our way..dropping moms and kids along the curbs. We have held each other through births,marriages,divorce and life! I cherish these strong women - we should all be so blessed!
Speaking of strong moms..I was in the Chapel at Spaulding a few weeks back and I met this lovely couple. They introduced themselves and not being one who follows the news or generally reads the paper - I didn't recognize the name till they sent me a card. They are the family who's lovely, young daughter went to work as a lifeguard in Western MA. and never came home. They found her remains weeks later. This woman was so loving and caring and was listening to my story when in fact she was living the story from hell. The strength and fortitude of the human spirit is beyond description at times. It is hard to feel sorry for oneself when all you have to do is look around!
Caleb is restful now, and when he is not - he is his usual ball of energy - grabbing at his IV line, biting holes out of his OT balls, angry to be in bed, mad at the world.. but I am not fooled - I have learned that anger is the healthy emotion that pushes us forward towards healing, so I am smiling inside watching this unfold. The day is beautiful, Caleb is healing, his doctors are gorgeous,we are blessed... life is good. Enjoy your day...enjoy yourself,enjoy each other-enjoy your life! mumsie
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dear sharyn....and through it all....each and every event/milestone/bump in the Road....including the birth of the Mustard Seed kitchen!!!....these super moms....held their kids in such high esteem that "throughout"...I know these kids felt unconditional LOVE and acceptance...with judgement and constructive criticism taking a secondary role(albeit IMPORTANT role)....
as a wise one once said(probably a mom!!) "Keep listening to your kids....keep 'em talking...and make sure that they know that you love 'em"....all Hail to Sharyn(Ms.Chief) and Anne,... and the Ellens...and Jodi...and Karie....and Lucia and Trudi...and all the dads and the other exceptional parents of our "world"in Wellfleet and Beyond..... It truly IS where we can make our most important contributions to the future...and our communities.
light!ly...ch/dad
ps ...you didn't mention the Chocolate nights!!!I just heard the "stories"!!!((-;
pps...the champagne parties were an early "pre-cursor" to Toddler Town@ the libray....to each generation..."their own rituals"(-;...The newer crop of kids and their parents in this town...are "keeping on.... keeping on" in their own awesome ways!!!!all Hail Wellfleet....
ppps..thanks, Sharyn, for providing some "herstory" for the wider Circle!!!
Hi Sharyn, Caleb, Kai, Max, Jan, and all others who love caleb so much that you have joined the ranks of the wellfleet pirate crew!! I love that there are pirates everywhere these days. Cedar, Ennie, Myself, and a band of rowdy scallywags had a blast at the Wellfleet fireworks on Thursday night...Cedar took video and Ennie took tons of pics...we had a flag flyin' and it was an experience I will not soon forget. Thank you wellfleet for showing me where I'm supposed to be at this time of my life. Give caleb a kiss for me and tell him I love him. Tell him each breath he takes will bring him one step closer to home. Good thoughts and lots of hugs...amy stj
pppps....
oooops ...and of course...Shelley....and Ted and Carmen and Brian and Jan and Bruce and Roland and Joe and the Toms and and and the rest of the Fleetian crew...and what a crew it is/was/ and proves to be....through THIS challenge ...and the rest that our community faces ...together!!!
hang in there,keep Living/Loving Strong!!! Potter/lindsays....we love you...
oughta caughta fishca . . .
I miss you billies!
Hey. All you moms should ask the kids what your special "'mom" name should be. I'm sure Caleb and your boys would agree you should go down in history as the "cake throwing" mom! I can only hope that the future moms of Wellfleet will get me through motherhood with laughter and love as the moms of the 80s. I look up to all of you and have really gotten to know so many of the moms better during these fundraisers and prayer circles. You have more family in this town than most people have on the planet. Caleb is such a gift. I am TRUELY blessed to have your kids as my friend and you as my mom-ish. I love you.
Restful Blessings~ Oooooooommmm xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
thank you sharyn,for your words of wisdom ...
miss you guys!!
weeks
Oh sorry . . . oughta caughta potta fishca . . . right girls?
what a beautiful family we have! i feel so blessed to have fed you all over the years at on a roll sandwich shop (@uncle frank's), the fish... and THEN get to torture the lot at nauset! i would not choose a better life if i could. the moms in this town rock my world, (and keep me employed) and keep me keepin' on... i love you billies and lassies.
Sharyn, thanks once again for your beautiful words. You have a way about you that is hard to find in this world! I am a teacher and in the first few weeks of school (and continued throughout the year)we talk about kindness. I thought it would be a nice idea to have my students make cards for Caleb as an example of what kindness looks like. In order to do this I would need an address to send them to. Would you mind mentioning that in your next blog? I would hate to send them to Mass General and not know if he got them or not. Thanks!! ~Barbara
Today is my 50th Birthday and I could think of no better present than good news about Caleb. It is good that he is difficult. "Good patients" die quietly in the corner and never give the nurses any trouble. Bad patients fight and do everything they can to get the hell out of the hospital. His survival is a testament to his personality. I look forward to the day when you are both back on the Cape drinking Champagne.
You all are so lucky to live where and when you do. You are lucky to have each other and blessed in the feeling of family. I have been praying for Caleb and have had him in my thoughts since I saw his picture and heard his story and started dropping money in all of the jars around town on my yearly return to home - Welfleet. Life has become particularly hard for me right now, but your strength and endurance are helping me keep afloat through the stormy waters in which I have found myself. I can only hope that I will endure with as much grace. I too am a big fan of champagne, and the bubbly warmth it creates when among friends....could use a glass right now....
Fight back Caleb, fight back Caleb, fight back Caleb.....my mantra is in my heart for all of you all of the time.
peg from PA
hottie,cottie, pottie, fishkin...haven't got a pot to piss in!!! A night on the phone" never to be forgotten.......follwed by fun in Shelley's van teaching a few of the "less than "worldly/educated" ones what "pressed ham" was...an image that lingered for weeks on the van window!!!! (and we actually were setiing examples for our children?) !!!!
Hello Caleb and Family...glad to hear you are making progress and on the mend...heard something one time like, "When things go wrong and they sometimes will, DON"T QUIT"! Someone will probably remember that poem. All of the burning candles last night were quite impressive. Anyway, happy thoughts and lots of hugs from the Lees on Sapokonish Way.....
What wonderful telling of the formation of community. It really does take a village to raise a child. The champagne club makes some of us Dad's envious.
Sharyn you have truely been blessed by the ongoing harvest of seeds you have sown over the years and continue to tend this ever expanding garden. We who are not part of the "core" are priviledged to be witness to this and to be able to join in support of Caleb's ongoing progress.
May the spirit who has blessed you and all of us in do many hidden and not so hidden ways over the years continue to show its deep work and presence.
Jeff
we love you Sharyn.....
xoxoxoxo
we carry you in our hearts-
I wasn't sure if you had been there for that part of the wedding - but I new it would be important for you to have it- And to let you know we think of you all day and night..and fat and sassy has always worked for me...so go with it- xoxoxo Sassy
I mean Big Boned and Sassy...but Dad says Fat...hehehh xoxo
Dear Sharyn,
Yes the day is beautiful and so are your words as usual. Caleb here's to the future days of healing and moving on to Spaulding and then home. love and prayers, Margie
here's that poem
Don't Quit
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill
When the funds are low and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh
When care is pressing you down a bit
Rest, you must - but don't you quit
Life is queer with its twists and turns
As everyone of us sometimes learns
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out
Don't give up, though the pace seems slow
You might succeed with another blow
Success is failure turned inside out, the silver tint of the clouds of doubt
And you never can tell how close you are, It may be near when it seems so far
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit
It's when things seem worst, That you MUST NOT QUIT!
by Quinton Howell
Sharyn,
I must say your story today which I am quite familiar with already has instilled a great idea for me. Starting this week at the Liquor Store I am including a Toddler section next to the Champagne aisle. Diapers, baby formula etc.... I'll be ahead of the curve for the next baby boom... Thanks for your inspiration!
M&M's are available at the counter...
;-))
Kevin
Sharyn,
I think that is so wonderful that you had the chance to bond with all of the early 80's Moms, and I hope that I may do the same with the new gen. of Mothers.
We have the newer generation of Fleetians blooming already...My Caleb, Ocean, Aaliyah, Ella May, Dante, Little Eve, and so many, many more. More fleetians to pee on your lawn, right Sharyn??? Hahahaha!!! ;)
Well, I'm so glad to hear that Caleb is making more improvements. That is SO good to here. Keep up the GREAT work, Lady!!! Your good energy is what's keeping your Pirate afloat.
Love Ya!
Nicole M.
Dear all....Now I CAN'T resist...almost shared this one at the circle last tuesday....Kristen Sh...another of our superb Wellfleet moms said of her Jesse S..when Duck Creek's Main Desk was at risk of a Jesse "flooding"..lo these many years ago.... "I can't get him to stop....but I can aim him!!!!"...
Aim High....Fleetians!!!!..
light!ly...ch/dad
Hi Sharyn,
Thanks for getting back to Jeremy....It's hard to believe that tomorrow is Labor Day already. We will think about what you wrote a few days ago and not complain about our jobs as we have the massive "check-out" of guests in the morning. So we'll grin while cleaning the toilets and the mountains of laundry and think of your positive attitude!!! We hope that this coming week Caleb will continue on the up and up and soon be back at Spaulding for the rehab.
Cheers to THE Greatest Momsie!
Patty and all the Crew
crazy lady,
Keep him pissed off, this is good. From knowing Caleb we know that he does his best work when he is pissed. So keep up the good work.
much love
Judith
p.s.
Almost ready for another water fight?
Sharyn,
As part of my daily routine I check in on your blog not only to check on how Caleb is doing but to read your words of wisdom! You are a continuing inspiration to mothers everywhere. As I watch my 5 yr. old boy sleep, I can't help but think about you and Caleb. The relationship between a mother and child is a bond like no other...and we see it every day through your words! You are a great mom! You and Caleb are lucky to have each other. You continue to be in our thoughts and prayers!
How about the 6am come as you are party . . . and Sharon with shirt just down to her you know what . . and nothing else. . . and Roland trying to get her to laugh or bend down all the time. I don't think she could sit down could she? Funny, funny, funny.
Have had no internet access the last two days, and it was making me crazy, not knowing how Caleb was. Glad to hear he is making so much progress, and glad to hear you sounding so cheerful and feisty!
As always, sending good thoughts and positive energy your way,
NY mom
Dear Sharyn....I am from Western Massachusetts and know of the family you speak about that lost their daughter that was a lifeguard. I hope Mr. Bish is doing well. I have not read any news of his health lately.
I am also so happy for you that your son is doing better. Like I said in an earlier post...we visited Wellfleet the week of July 9 right after Caleb's accident. And a man I work with knows Shaye..he is an avid surfer and has a photo in his office done by Shaye.
I hope Caleb continues on the road to good health. I read your post every day.
Bon-bons, margaritas, pressed ham, "your catheter is showing", facials and cards all night in a suite of the Sheraton Back Bay, the day spent climbing fallen trees from Hurricane Bob in the conservation land where Cedar and Caleb later hid out, Ted's streaking at every Christmas party...
So many parts to life, the simplest of pleasures is knowing your friends are there.
Dear Sharyn, Yesterday I was thinking about planning for Thanksgiving, the one holiday other than Valentine's Day with my honey that I love to plan for. And I thought, this year is special ... a lot to be thankful for ... especially for the fight that Caleb has been putting up, and his family, and living for these past 13 years in Fleet (and our new grandbaby). This blog helps us all in ways we do, and don't yet, know about - we've all become family here I think (while in front of the Market, I heard a visitor last week say something disparaging about the group on the lawn of Town Hall and I felt like a tiger mom defending my family) - and we in turn send our strength and hopes and well-wishing thoughts to you and the Lad. arlene
Hi Sharyn,
Well,it seems that the long and winding road, hopefully, has taken a more direct route.What wonderful news it is.I think you were right when you told Amy you thought Caleb might be taking little side trips and visiting folks now and then.Although I have not met Caleb, I feel that I know him thru Amy.Several nights ago I had a dream about a cat(I have a wonderful cat named Ziggy) and a fox. I was carrying the cat and the fox was at my feet looking up at me and I felt he wanted me to carry him as well.The rest is blurry but when I woke up I had a very wonderful warm feeling that all was right with the world,so to speak.An earlier blog I am certain was a strong influence. Caleb is constantly in my thoughts and so are you and the rest of your family.
My very best wishes and love to you all. Penny (on St.John)
One day we will share wine and stories.
Hmmmm, my husband always wants me to eat the green M&Ms.
Sharyn,
I've been too shy to leave comment on the blog all summer, but I wanted you to know how much you, and Caleb, and the outpouring of love from the town, have meant to everyone. Every day as people walked through the town this summer, or sat at the restaurants, or shopped in the stores they saw Caleb's picture and the little signs and they asked each other about him. I was having some quiet time at Kia Ora a few weeks ago--leaving my girls with my mother whose garden you, and Caleb, and Kai, and everyone it seems in Wellfleet put in, when I fell to talking about Caleb to my waitress, Amy who had just been to see Caleb. I was sewing a doll quilt and she had sewn a Caleb doll and we talked about so much: Caleb, the garden you put in for my mother, the work you and your family have done all over town, the lives you've touched, the pain everyone is feeling.
I've had that same conversation with so many people I never spoke to before. Its drawn people together, it has made them look around and pull their families closer, it has made them put up their heads and sniff the ocean and look at the flowers in a way that they never did before.
I have thought about you all every day this summer since my mother came back from the fourth and told me what happened. I wanted to let you know that your posts, your insights, your strength has been like a stone thrown out into the ocean. The ripples just get wider with each ring, eventually coming to rest on some far distant island and re-arranging some far distant shore.
I'm thinking of you and Caleb and dreaming and wishing you continued strength and courage.
much love
Kate Gilbert
Eric Domeshek
Maya Domeshek
Alexandra Domeshek
and everyone at the shores of the garden at Long Pond Road.
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