On the fourth of July, 2007 Caleb Potter was involved in a skateboarding accident.
He suffered serious injuries and continues to need all of our positive thoughts and prayers.
This blog is to serve as a space for updates on Caleb's journey of recovery.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

Memorial

There will be a celebration of Jan's life on Sunday the 20th of April at high noon at Newcomb beach. A pot luck at the Lindsay/Potter residence will follow on Long Pond rd. All are welcomed....... please park at the Long Pond Parking lot and walk in.

The boys ask that you understand that they have chosen life!

73 comments:

Anonymous said...

Manitonquat once spoke at the Congo church in Wellfleet....at the request of Jesse Shantz' father Ellis Bradley......these are words that I have lived by for 34 yrs.... I offer his words in tribute to LIFE...and the choices we all make ...every day....peace..light!ly....ch/dad

Wellfleet will circle 'round.....for LIFE!



A Prayer to Humankind


Hear, O Humankind, the prayer of my Heart.


For are we not one, have we not one desire,
to heal our Mother Earth and bind her wounds?
And still to be free as the spotted Eagle climbing
the laughing breath of our Father Sky,
to hear again from dark forests and flashing rivers the varied ever-changing Song of Creation.


O Humankind, are we not all brothers and sisters,
are we not the grandchildren of the Great Mystery?
Do we not all want to love and be loved, to work
and to play, to sing and dance together?
But we live with fear. Fear that is hate, fear
that is mistrust, envy, greed, vanity, fear that is
ambition, competition, aggression, fear that is
loneliness, anger, bitterness, cruelty.....and yet,
fear is only twisted love, love turned back on itself, love that was denied, love that was rejected.....

and Love.......
Love is LIFE - creation, seed and leaf
and blossom and fruit and seed, love is growth
and search and reach and touch and dance,
love is nurture and succour and feed and pleasure.........
Love is Pleasuring ourselves.......
Pleasuring each other......
love is Life believing in itself.

And Life.....

Life is the Sacred Mystery singing to itself, dancing to it's drum, telling tales, improvising, playing, and we are all that Spirit, our stories all
but one cosmic story that we ARE love indeed,
that perfect love in me seeks the love in you,
and if our eyes could ever meet without fear
we would recognize each other and rejoice
for love is life believing in itself.

O Humankind, we must stop fearing life,
fearing each other, we must absolutely
stop hating ourselves, resenting Creation....Life,
O Humankind, life is the only treasure.
We are the custodians of it, it is our sacred trust.
Life is wondrous, awesome and Holy, a burning glory,
and it's price is simply this : Courage.....
We must be brave enough to Love.

Hear my heart's prayer, O humankind,
trust in love, don't be afraid, I love you
as I love life, I love myself, please
love me too, for perfect Love,
as a wise one said, casts out all fear.
If we are to love there is no other choice,
for Love is Life believing in itself.


Above all,


Let us set the children free, break the traps
of fear that history has fashioned for them,
free to grow, to seek and question, to dance, to laugh,and sing..to be dreamers of tomorrow's Rainbows,

and if we but give them our trust
they will guide us to the New Creation,
for .............Love is life believing in itself.

Hear O Humankind, the Prayer of my Heart

Manitonquat - Medicine Story
Assonet / Wampanoag
printed in Return to Creation
by Medicine Story

Anonymous said...

I'll be there without fail. Thank you for opening your home.

Beautiful words...something I will now recite to myself.

Choosing life is choosing a future with more in store for yourself than you have yet to understand or experience. Good decision, boys.

Anonymous said...

Choose Life...Good Decision Boys You have been taught well:) Rock on

Anonymous said...

Such beautiful words, ch/dad! Let us all choose life. I will be at the memorial in spirit...

Anonymous said...

EXTRAORDINARY,
simply EXTRAORDINARY.
All of you.
All of your hearts.
All of your lives.
All of your extraordinary and generous ways of honoring each other.

Unknown said...

I too will be there in spirit, with my heart overflowing...with love and the choice of life.
As always, with hope,
peg from PA

Anonymous said...

www.dashpoemmovie.com

Take a minute to check out the video above. I hope everyone leaves behind a great dash!!

Brenda CT/Wellfleet

Anonymous said...

Thank you Sharyn, especially letting us know the boys decision - they're the ones especially that could have gone the other way. And between ch/dad and the dashpoem I'm going to try and smile today.

Jeff- in the Berkshires said...

and life has chosen them!!

will be there if spirit as I often am

susan in portsmouth said...

Thank you, Chuck, and thank you Sharyn for the reassurance.

We will also be there in spirit with Peg and Jeff and the rest of your extended family. We continue to hold you all in our hearts.

Profound love and hope,
Susan, Hannah and Liam

Anonymous said...

I, too will join your circle (in spirit) to celebrate the life that was Jan's; and to join my heart with all of yours in choosing life and each other.
Jackie

Anonymous said...

I will also be there in spirit, with an aching heart, praying for you all and wishing you the strength to wake up every day choosing life and love. When your small community gathers, please make sure to know that there is an enormous community of others standing there with you all in spirit.

Amy from western MA

Anonymous said...

Thank you Chuck, this is beautiful and will no doubt lift us up today.

Sharyn, Caleb, Kai and Max, your courage and strength once again will hold you up.

Peace-
Audrey

becky said...

Your families courage inspires me. My prayers contine for you. What a community you have!

Anonymous said...

thank you ch/dad.
thank you sharyn
thank you caleb. kai. max.
thank you jan.
thank you wellfleet
thank you precious hearts
thank you Universe

Anonymous said...

thank you for keeping us informed so that we can be there in spirit to help lift you all up. celebration of life..... choose life... very powerful words.

you all have my heart and prayers and love. i will miss the memorial by 3 days, will be there on the 23rd and hope to run into some of the tribe to give great big hugs.

boys.... chin up.... i know it is hard right now, but remember you have ALL of us with you ALL the time.

peace to everyone this rainy april morning....
amy in ct

Anonymous said...

It is relieving and uplifting to know that the boys have chosen life. They are truly beautiful.

Anonymous said...

We will be there with open arms and open hearts! Our beloved friend will be so missed by us all. We look forward to the celebration of his life, and the healing of his death. Be well & Jah Bless. xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Anonymous said...

Thank you, ch/dad, that was really beautiful. Perfect way to start this day.
Melinda

Anonymous said...

Choose life! So glad to read that.
There is nothing anyone can say to help ease the pain you are all dealing with, just know that we are all out there thinking of your family.
Take care

Anonymous said...

I cannot be with you for Jan's Memorial, but my heart goes out to Sarah and the Family and I will be there in spirit. Much love to the Good Decision Boys!

Beverly in Vermont

Anonymous said...

I am wanting to send flowers and an acknowledgement to the police dept & EMT's.. A friend of mine rode with Jan to Cape Cod Hospital.. an EMT , I realized the importance of this position just yesterday.. Just wanting to share the depth and size of the community and angels at hand ALWAYS... Blessings to us all...
Namaste

Anonymous said...

I am wanting to send flowers and an acknowledgement to the police dept & EMT's.. A friend of mine rode with Jan to Cape Cod Hospital.. an EMT , I realized the importance of this position just yesterday.. Just wanting to share the depth and size of the community and angels at hand ALWAYS... Blessings to us all...
Namaste

Anonymous said...

Beautiful.

Jeff- in the Berkshires said...

Sharyn, Max, Kai, Caleb, Sarah and family and friends,

Something that has brought me back to this place many times is your continued choice of life. The easter nests, the campfires, the mustard seed, the surf, the gardens, the committment to community and each other - all strong signs of the celebration of life that long pre-dates this blog. The formitable strength that Caleb has fought for life with all of you fighting along as well, the openess you all share feelings, hurt, joy, saddness and anger and challenges and struggles. The wonder of the seals and of the sky full of stars and stories of happier times; the absolute wonder of healing. These are all about life and of hope and the celebration of life on all levels.
If the temendous outpouring of comments this week shows one thing it is how we are all interconnected on some level and our choice of life has a profound rippling effect on so many.

Continue to choose life and be well.

Anonymous said...

I will light a candle from my home on the Upper Cape tonight thinking of the strong community and strong Lindsey/Potter family. My prayers go out to Sarah as well, I hope people are there to rally around her and hold her up at this time.
I remember Jan from 18 years ago. A married man with three blonde boys and a beautiful wife. He always had a good attitude and a smile. He had many good years and good friends. I'm glad the boys are choosing life and getting along. They have/had two good role models in their parents and a huge community who love them. I don't just mean Wellfleet either, this blog has proven to be a community in itself.
Peace, love, blessings, and happiness always.
Good luck today and always. Stay strong.

J

Anonymous said...

A friend sent me this in an email a few weeks ago and I have kept it and read it over and over again.
"Just up the road is a field with two horses in it. From the distance each horse looks like any other horse but it you stop your car or are walking by you will notice something quite amazing...looking into the eyes of one horse will disclose that he is blind. His owner has chosen not to have him put down but has made a good home for him. If you stand nearby and listen you will hear the sound of a bell. Looking around for the source of the sound you will see that it comes from the smaller horse in the field. Attached to the horse's halter is a small bell. It lets the blind friend know where the other horse is so he can follow. As you watch these two friends you will see that the horse with the bell is always checking on the blind horse and that the blind horse will listen for the bell and slowly walk to where the other horse is, trusting that he will not be led astray. Like the owner of these two horses we are not thrown away just because we are not perfect or because we have problems or challenges. We are watched over and others are brought into our lives to help us when we are in need. Sometimes we are the blind horse being guided by the little ringing bell, other times we are the quide horse, helping others to find their way. Good friends are like that...you may not always see them but you know they are always there. Please listen for my bell and I'll listen for yours. And remember, be kinder than necessary. Everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly and leave the rest. Live isn't about waiting for the storm to pass it's about learning to dance in the rain."

Anonymous said...

You Potter men are f'n rocks. Pillars of strength, humbleness, and a true example to living right. Good choice lads..

Sharyn, you are wonderful, a miracle in yourself.

I wish for days full of peace, nights full of rest, and loads of smiles on the horizon.. I may not be there the 20th, but will see you all soon after!!

Xo..BIG BIG love.. CLance & Chema

P.S. Papa Ch, thanks for always knowing how to comfort us with your words, and reminding us how precious life is.

Anonymous said...

Nice write up in CCT today.

Anonymous said...

Sharyn,sky,ch/dad,all other bloggers, i can't thank you all enough for creating this site to come to everyday, several times a day to feel as close as i can to you all at this time. Not a moment goes by that i don't think of you all and my heart continues to ache. The furnace in my house shut down on tuesday, so for the past 48 hours ive been cold! But i cuddle under my blankets, wearing an old beanie of caleb's ive held onto for awhile and i pray for jan and you all. stay warm..love grace

Anonymous said...

To Sarah and the Potter/Lindsay clan
I can't imagine the anguish, agony and heartbreak you must be feeling, to be abandoned in such a horrific way. I wish you healing, true healing - let it all out, scream, cry, barter, deny, but ultimately accept the truth. It undoubtedly will take some time, loss is so hard. Merge with those who have already traveled this difficult path...to peace.

Anonymous said...

Thank you jenni for your blogging too!!! and also, your friendship and kindness; you are an amazing girl and i am so glad to know you. xoxo

Anonymous said...

i sit silently in the mountains of new mexico...

i listen to the passing flow of water in the stream below...

i watch as a delicate butterfly dance's around the early blooming wildflowers...

i feel the wind and hear the rustling of the trees...

i look to the sky and see an eagle soaring...

i feel a piece of jan's spirit in all that surrounds me...

i will celebrate jan's earthly life...

i will manifest peace to jan on his journey...

Anonymous said...

The story of the two horses is just beautiful and so appropriate for Caleb, his family and the entire community. Thanks for sharing.

Amy from western MA

Anonymous said...

Attitude is everything and once again you lead the way- love has found you and holds us all. Thanks ch , sky and all in this circle who hold space for hope to enter. Love and peace- ann m.

Anonymous said...

Dear all.....the great words about two horses....above....were sweet and true....and THAT was about two horses....when you need reassurance that ANY two of us can get along and care for each other....check this out!!! it's about a kitten and a crow!!!
Peace and light!ly.....this drizzly morning @ the edge of the BLUE!....ch/dad

http://www.slide.com/r/hD6
DvyAOxD9ClUhvUpVcUMABW9QzpGnQ

Anonymous said...

someone mentioned around 11:30 this am that there was a nice write up in the cape cod times today, can anyone send us 'cyber family' a link. i tried checking the site but had no luck
thanks
amy in ct

Anonymous said...

From CC Times
By Eric Williams
April 04, 2008

It’s been a tough week in Wellfleet, especially for a local family that has already seen hard times.

On Tuesday, longtime resident Jan Potter, took his own life at Newcomb Hollow Beach.

Potter, a contractor, amateur surfer and a true spirit of the town, was the father of Caleb Potter whom the town rallied around after he was seriously injured in a skateboarding accident on July 4.

The story of Caleb Potter’s slow recovery and the outpouring of grief over Jan Potter’s death can be read at a remarkable family blog: calebpotter.blogspot.com.

A celebration of Jan Potter’s life will be held at noon on April 20th at Newcomb Hollow Beach in Wellfleet. A makeshift shrine, consisting of Potter’s surfboard, hammer and a photo, stands there now.

haley.jane said...

Fully alive
More than most
Ready to smile and love life
Fully alive and she knows
How to believe in futures
-Flyleaf

I'm trying my best to make it. As long as all works out with flights and passports, I WILL make it.

Love you. Praying for you. Haley. xo

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to add that making an intention like choosing life is powerful. Making space to let your feelings surface is healing. With gratitude to witness this presence of love supporting all. peace, ann m

Anonymous said...

thank you for the article

though we are far removed....we are one

amy in ct

Anonymous said...

I will be back in Haiti with another group of kids during the 20th, but please please know that I am there with you all. I love you(s)

CapeSummerGirl said...

I always find it interesting which people touch our lives, whether we know them or not. Since I first read about Caleb's accident I have followed with interest and a hopeful heart his story and ultimately the story of his family.
The news of Jan's death sent shockwaves through me... Although I have not yet met Caleb or Sharon, or Caleb's brothers, they are a family I have carried in my heart since seeing a photo of a smiling, blond Caleb in the newspaper.
As one who has suffered from the heaviness of life and depression that was often smothering yet forced my way through the darkness to find light, I was deeply saddened that the light remained elusive for Jan, at least in his perspective.
Again, this family has been faced with tragedy and struggle. And again, as made clear in this blog, the family continues to find all that is good and sacred in Life, choosing to cherish all that was wonderful and dear about Jan and celebrate the gifts he gave to so many during his life.
When I feel less than whole and it's difficult to find the light, I will often stumble into thoughts of Sharyn and Caleb. Soon, thinking of their determination and the powerful Love it comes from, I am pulled from my depths back to the surface where the sun shines warmly upon me.
Sharyn, Caleb, Kai, Max - while there may be rain falling now, the sun will shine again, warming your skin, your hearts and your souls. Your family Loves you. Your community Loves you. People you've not even met Love you.
We're all sending that Love your way today and every day. Feel it, take it in, fill your hearts with it.
Draw a circle around those you Love, for a circle remains forever unbroken.
May you be encircled in Love.

jade said...

That beach, the board, the hammer,your face, that smile, your spirit, the sea! You give us all a place to come together or to come to alone. To say goodbye to you, and hello to the others that show. I grieve, and cry and struggle to understand, but know you are loved and we are not alone!

I will miss you all of my life.

Love to you all.
J.

Anonymous said...

I got to know Jan last year. What an extraordinary human being.
I can't believe it.
My warmest feelings to the family and everybody who loved him. He will be missed big time.

Peace. Torsten

Anonymous said...

I have been reading this blog since a visit to Welfleet shortly after Caleb's accident. I have never commented before. Caleb has been doing so well, that I stopped checking the blog as much as I was when he was in the hospital. I was shocked when I read the blog today. I wish you all continued strength on life's journey.

Samantha - NYC

Anonymous said...

Thank you Sharyn. I will be at the memorial in spirit. God Bless.

Peggy from Western MA

Anonymous said...

Like each corner of a triange, may Caleb, Kai and Max take strength from eachother. They're amazing and choosing life confirms it.

I'll be thinking of the entire Potter/Lindsay family and keeping you in my prayers.

Deb

Anonymous said...

Caleb, Kai and Max,
How well you know us too, that we needed to hear reassurance that you will take the path of life, through the thorny thickets, dark forests and tempestuous storms, knowing one cannot fully know joy without experiencing pain. There WILL be sweeter times.
And Sharyn, Caleb's accident did not happen for you to experience closure with Jan. That I do not believe. At every turn in life there is a lesson learned, and something, God knows it is not always apparent what that might be, is gained. Your time spent at Cab's bedside gave you the time/space/ability to shut off the outside world at will. I don't think you've ever had that space- horrible circumstances but nonetheless- space to reflect. You have grown. In your early blogs you struggled to find expression and now your thoughts flow easily into words and, though your are in pain, you are clear.
Your thoughts on Jan were becoming clearer because they HAD to, it was the time for it.
I send you my love,
T

Mommato2 said...

I have checked your blog regularly since hearing about it last fall. I have always been amazed at your spirit at every curve ball that has been thrown your way.

This is no exception.

I am so sorry for you all.

It sounds like you have many many real and cyber friends rallying around you.

Sending love your way from up the coast in Nova Scotia.

xoxoxo

Anonymous said...

To Max, Kai, Caleb and Sharyn

May the angels keep you
till morning.
May they guide you through
the night.
May they comfort all your sorrows.
May they help you win the fight.
May they keep watch on your souls.
May they guard you while you
are sleeping.
May they see you through your days.

Love and Peace to all.

Christa said...

Sharyn and the family...our deepest thoughts, love and prayers are with all of you at this time. It is with tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat that I write this. May you keep your strength and love as close to your heart as we keep you to ours!

Jan, may you find the most awesome wave, never grow tired and ride it forever! Shaka!

Christa and the Jones family
Wilmington, NC

Anonymous said...

While I think it's good for us all to share our feelings and thoughts here, I do rather yearn for a sphere of privacy to be set up around the family. This is intensely private business that they are about, and surely it's time for us to give them the space they need to deal with all the complications of this event. The great thing about a small town (and the community of this blog) is that we are involved with each other, a not so great thing about a small town, etc. is that we can interfere with what is meant to be private. Let's leave them alone for a while.
jack

Anonymous said...

Well said Jack!

Anonymous said...

Dittos Jack. Couldn't of said it better myself.

Anonymous said...

"Gently, lightly I hold this life,
Gently, lightly...

Love exists in as many ways as there are angles of the sun on the ocean..."

Words we sang tonight for Jan...may there be peace for all tonight-

Audrey

Anonymous said...

April 4th ....8pm....

We were few....
though we were Many...

we circled.....we hugged..we drummed....we candled....we sang....we held each other ....and the Circle ...held...Many many more.....

we missed Jan....we shared story...we sang some more....

we were glad we were there

we are glad we are Here

we missed you , jan.....

Wish you were here !......
*********************************
*********************************
For a Surfer....

FOR A DANCER...j.browne

Keep a fire burning in your eye
Pay attention to the open sky
You never know what will be coming down
I don't remember losing track of you
You were always dancing in and out of view
I must have thought you'd always be around
Always keeping things real by playing the clown
Now you're nowhere to be found

I don't know what happens when people die
Can't seem to grasp it as hard as I try
It's like a song I can hear playing right in my ear
That I can't sing
I can't help listening
And I can't help feeling stupid standing round
Crying as they ease you down
'cause I know that you'd rather we were dancing
Dancing our sorrow away
(right on dancing)
No matter what fate chooses to play
(theres nothing you can do about it anyway)

Just do the steps that you've been shown
By everyone you've ever known
Until the dance becomes your very own
No matter how close to yours
Another's steps have grown
In the end there is one dance you'll do alone

Keep a fire for the human race
Let your prayers go drifting into space
You never know what will be coming down
Perhaps a better world is drawing near
And just as easily it could all disappear
Along with whatever meaning you might have found
Don't let the uncertainty turn you around
(the world keeps turning around and around)
Go on and make a joyful sound

Into a dancer you have grown
From a seed somebody else has thrown
Go on ahead and throw some seeds of your own
And somewhere between the time you arrive
And the time you go
May lie a reason you were alive
But you'll never know.


(Remember and "Live for" the - Dash!)

light!ly....ch/dad

Anonymous said...

I am somewhat distressed by the psuedo analysis I'm reading on the blog. I didn't know there was a question about the boys" choosing life. And Sharyn's past relationship with Jan is her business not ours.

None of us can really know the darkness and despair Jan was feeling that led him to end his life. What I know is that I loved him deeply as a dear dear friend, as I know so many of us did. And the loss for Sarah and Caleb, Kai, Max, Sharyn, Ken, Vivi, and in particular I can only imagine is so painful. Let's respect and honor their grief by keeping our analysis to ourselves and share our love and support to help them through this heartwrenching loss.

Anonymous said...

my heart is with you...... if i had one wish it would be to give all of you a hug......A BIG HUG.

Anonymous said...

Chuck,

Great words and poetry!

Glad I was there.....


Kevin

Unknown said...

- Kai -
all week I sat at my Boston desk - and I thought about you. I wrote emails, answered phones, went to meetings - and I thought about you. I called Chelsea to ask what happened – and I thought about you. I thought about your family - your brothers, your Mom, all of Wellfleet - all the struggles - But I thought most on you - - shaggy blonde hair - kind of scrappy, really strong - climbing trees, running fast, smiling big -
I don’t understand your loss, Kai - I can’t comprehend this pain. But I thought about you– And will think more and more. You’re all in my heart, my prayers, my mind.
- Emily

Anonymous said...

I am thinking of all of you now...

Anonymous said...

This IS an extremely private time for the family.
I will continue to post thoughts here - in case, Sharyn, or any family member needs to check here for reassurance that we all still do care - and are all here, for whenever Sharyn, Caleb, Max, Kai, or anybody else might need to check in.....
That's it - that's all they need to know from this cyber family - we are here .....


Nancy in NY

Anonymous said...

What shocking news
Abigail Miller

Anonymous said...

JAN, the magnificent tragedy of your decision is felt in each atom of my being. where do we go from here?

Anonymous said...

Oh I love the dash....makes us all take a step back and think......God bless you all, our thoughts and prayers are always with you. I
Lisa in Pa

Anonymous said...

I wish I could have been there last night. To share in the circle of love for Jan. Know that I was there in thoughts and in spirt.
I want to send my love to you all today.
Be strong hold each other tight. Know you are loved.
Much Love,
Kim Harris

Anonymous said...

Deep peace I breathe into you
Oh weariness here, O ache, here!
Deep peace, a soft white dove to you;
Deep peace, a quiet rain to you;
Deep peace, an ebbing wave to you!
Deep peace, red wind of the east from you;
Deep peace, gray wind of the west to you;
Deep peace, dark wind of the north from you;
Deep peace, blue wind of the south to you!
Deep peace, pure red of the flame to you;
Deep peace, pure white of the moon to you;
Deep peace, pure green of the grass to you;
Deep peace, pure brown of the living earth to you;
Deep peace, pure gray of the dew to you;
Deep peace, pure blue of the sky to you!
Deep peace of the running wave to you,
Deep peace of the flowing air to you,
Deep peace of the quiet Earth to you,
Deep peace of the sleeping stones to you,
Deep peace of the yellow shepherd to you,
Deep peace of the wandering shepherdess to you,
Deep peace of the Flock of Stars to You.
Deep Peace of the Son of Peace to You.
Deep peace, Deep Peace.

Anonymous said...

Dear Sharyn, Caleb, Max, Kai, and Sarah...Please know that you all remain encircled in deep Love, Support and the Peace that passes all understanding.

Mari and I hope to join you on the 20th. Thank you for including us, your extended cyber family.

Be well this night,

Blessings,

Con Carino,

Melinda

Anonymous said...

I'm deeply saddend by your loss and those of us that spent time with jan. Sharyn and the kids[men] draw strength from each other I'll be there with a sad but open heart,Thank you for allowing us into your circle of life Peter LaFrance/Wellfleet/Truro

Anonymous said...

Those of us who will only be there in spirit would love to see photos of the beautiful event.

Anonymous said...

With so many others, I am alongside you just now, sending all of my love, as you gather together. Sarah Anthony

Anonymous said...

"Happiness is not a matter of events. It depends upon the tides of the mind."
Alice Meynell