Some mornings, like this one, I wake early, fill my coffee cup and sit next to Caleb while he sleeps. Looking at him takes me back to a place in time when I knew what my life was like and what it would be (or so I thought). The chickadees are lined up in formation among the lilacs vieing for their turn at the feeder. The cat has already been chucked out the door and Spud has wedged his way through as well to get to his bowl. Max, out late as usual will not be spotted for another couple of hours and Kai is out the door for an early surf session. I sit alone in the room.
If you did not know what happened you could almost be fooled into thinking that Caleb is just playing possum, will be smiling up at you in a second, and will be out the door in another ready to prey on the first friend he bumps into....he looks like perfection itself. We have lived through hell and are still here to talk about it- to ruminate. It is a risk to love- and I would not have it any other way. One of the gifts of being a single mom was that I didn't have a moment that I could miss watching, observing and being involved with my three. It has been a gift that I treasure and hold tight like the priceless tag that is attached.
Love today - don't be afraid to become kinder, take time to smile, look at one another as tho it might be the last time you will see them as they are now.....it just might be..
We are indeed holding up well..and loving completely.
Mumsie
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Wow, Sharyn, you took my breath away with this one. What a lesson---to look at our loved ones as if it might be the last time we see them as they are. Life does bring changes, expected and unexpected. Can we ever prepare for these? I think the best we can do is adjust to them as they come. But not taking what we have for granted---ahh, that is the hardest thing to keep in mind. Thanks for the reminder.
Thinking of you all,
Amy from western MA
Good Morning Sharyn!
Sounds like u are in better spirits which is always a relief for your friends!
There is much more to love........
..................................
xoxoxo kolleen
you're an inspiration to me. I seem to get caught up in how bad things are but when I get a moment to slow down and do something like read this blog I feel better. Thank you for showing me the way so many times since July 4th. We could all use a little Sharyn in our lives. Not sure where I'm going with that but take what you need out of those words people. hahahaha.
yours in rock,
settie
Sharyn - so beautifully, beautifully put to words! You are absolutely right and I will heed your advice. Glad to hear you are hanging in.
Love, Mom from CT
Sharyn,
My husband insists that we kiss each time one of us leaves the house . . . because you never know if it might be our last. Love is the most precious thing we all have and you remind me of that time and time again. When everything else is gone, love and the memory of love is everlasting.
Bless you and your children.
Patty
Good day Mumsie..
You are so wonderful, kind, lovely, & fill me with ease as I take on this Saturday afternoon.
I love you dearly..xo..Clancy
Sharyn,
I thank you with every fiber of my being for the tears that are spilling down my cheeks, the sweet heat that is at this moment melting the corners of my heart that were quite icy just this morning and the deep breath that has expanded my ribcage and made room for that newly molten heart-berg.
I am off to see my beautiful daughter and I will kiss her face before I leave her with fervor and joy and gratitude....and then some.
You are a pure blessing to me and I am in wholehearted agreement with Settie's assessment - Everyone should know the gift of Sharyn in their lives.
Big Love from the center of my lovely puddle (tears and a drippy heart!)-
Susan
Sharyn,
The sun rises and the sun sets and you remain strong Sharyn... Good to know we can depend on some things in life! Just don't let them chuck you out the door like the cat! You may feel alone but I am sure you know you have many Guardian Angels watching over you...Some of our halos are just on a little more crooked than others... Not mine of course! OMG no!
Love is a risk, but is it any worse than poker? Your "Full House" will win many more times than not!
Kevin
"The best laid plans o' mice and men often go astray..."(burns) ..... love for the day, day by day..as you do...
It is the not knowing what's around the bend that keeps us moving forward.
I believe we could be unable to move if we knew what was to come, but standing in one place is not an option if one wants to live fully, while basking in the joys and working through the tragedies that life inevitably brings us. Love is an integral part of the process, the part without which we would not be able to deal the bogeyman around the corner and at the same time, which allows us to feel happiness without measure. For those of us fortunate to have love in our lives ( and there seems to be very little shortage in these pages) remembering to nurture it is an important lesson. Life is not a given, love is not a given, nor is happiness or health. These are all gifts we must embrace with all of our hearts, and treasure as irreplaceable.
Your words strike deep, Sharyn. I hear you clearly.
As always, with hope,
peg from PA
Hi Sharyn...beautifully put if I do say so myself. Your post today lightened my spirits...took me away for a minute to think stop thinking about all of my damn homework due this week, and enjoy what I have in my life. I am happy to know that you are in good spirits today. You are an amazing woman and I would imagine that to each and every young woman(and perhaps man...but I wouldn't know...) you are simply an inspiration for future or present parenthood. Thank you for whispering your lovely words from Fleet as I sit in the snowy Berkshires. I was a bit cold but now I feel warmer....
Thank you:)
Corey
Sharyn,
You break my heart. I'll quote John and Paul to stay with the theme of today. " and in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make"
a great word I learned from my kids fits this completely, sweet........
Shayrn you are blessed and you bless.
Sharyn...you are a pillar. you are an amazing woman and the true definition of what a Mother is.
My name is Michelle and you may not remember me but I came to visit Caleb a few summers ago.
In jan . of '04 I moved out to Steamboat, Colorado to attend CMC. Thats where I met this zany, eclectic, unique, funny and witty lad by the name Caleb Potter. What a guy!! We shared the same small group of friends and spent most of our time snowboarding. We had so many memorable times, times that have somewhat defined my little walk on this planet!
I came upon this blog just tonight. I cant believe what has happened...but after reading through the whole blog...I can honestly say "Caleb, you were born to defy the odds".
Caleb. Its been so long!! I couldnt believe that I came upon this blog but Im happy I did. Shocked to hear what you went through but not surprised to find out how well you are coming around. Our time in Steamboat was awesome!! Powder days and late night cafeteria are some of my most memorable times. Love and blessings to you, my friend.
You forgot the part about the wonderful scent of the potter clan emminating from the throne room. One by one relaxing in the favorite room in the house. See you soon.
much love
judith
Ahh! I will sleep well tonight with a smile on my face...your words are so descriptive I felt like I was at your home this morning!!! Thank you for being such a positve influence in our lives without even meeting you, not a day goes by that your family's name doesn't come up...it is an amazing story with some amazing characters and I feel the need to "brag" about how awesome you all are and I have never met you personally....how cool is that :) Glad to hear the calmness in your words and peacefulness...may each day bring you more peace and serenity...sweet dreams
A blessed mom in Annapolis
Dear Sharyn...The ripples that eminate from the gestures of love and compassion go on forever. Every word, deed that has given hope rings as a reminder in this universe of ours, that we are all connected. The love that pours out from you as your watch your son sleep is felt forever, like the ripples of the pebble in the pond. The energy that comes from love is never stagnant, but dynamic, and felt to the core of our being. This love that has sustained you, and in turn, inspired so many of us, is the "glue" that keeps us together, on so many levels. Without it, we are incomplete, and "lost". Thank you for reminding us to never take it for granted, and to live in gratitude for every opportunity we encounter to express and show it...to our loved ones, friends and stangers. I am constantly reminded of the lessons I have learned here about acting on impulses on love and kindness when they occur, and not putting it off til later. As a result I hope I am more patient, more spontaneous, and take every opportunity to let my children know they are loved, and that I am eternally grateful for their existance in my life....
Thank you Sharyn....you all continue in thought and prayer for continued health, abundance, joy and peace....To Caleb, you are never far from thought, keep up the great job you are doing on your healing quest..you are amazing and blessed to have such a loving and energetic family!
Que duermen con los angelitos,
Con Carino,
Melinda
Sharyn, I know how you feel, looking down on your son, remembering who and what he was "before" (accident,illness,etc)...and wondering who and what he'll be from now on...I found it so hard to say goodbye to the grown son I loved and knew so well, wanting him back the way he was, but that wasn't to be...I've learned to love and accept what and who he is now, and even find myself loving him more fiercely than before.
Life doesn't have a script, and every morning when we open our eyes we have little control over the events that will unfold.
Learning to go with the flow is so difficult, but we all grow from the experience. I see that in your written word as the blog has progressed from the first day. Things that seemed important and necessary become trivial in the reality of it all.
Hang in there, keep loving your son for who and what he is now, and keep writing!
Thank you Sharyn! Have a GREAT day! YOU are OBVIOUSLY an extremely special being! I feel really blessed to be made aware of you and your families "journey"....Thank you again!
Hi Sharyn, it's great to know you've found some comfort being at home with the boys. I am loving being back at my homestead in brewster. It's so important to see my family everyday. It just makes a more wholesome feeling in everything that i do knowing that everyone is well. You make me smile! Love always. Gracie McFinch
Living with loved ones, particulary when they hurt you or are hurt or hurting themselves, is the biggest challenge. You are right though Sharyn. What is it all about if we dont give ourselves completely.
You are amazing, I wish I knew you.
Ali Manchester UK
You certainly set the mood with your beautiful and thoughtful words,Sharyn.
I am there is spirit.
A kiss on the forehead for Caleb!
Love and peace. Penny on St.John
once again you have moved me to tears. i am truly grateful for everything i have in my life and your words help me feel this.
you are elloquent, and i love to read your thoughts.
i will love out loud today.
peace and prayers to caleb and you tonight
amy in ct
thank you for reminding me what love really is about and that every day we can have those that we love in our lives it makes it all worth it!
keep on keeping on! :)
warm aloha wishes
ariana
When the cup is fullest it is most difficult to carry.
Sharyn,
You've given me a gift today. I'm a single mom and you will never have any idea how much you have helped not only me with your words today, but also my 20 year old son.
Thank you. You don't know me, but know that I am just one of the many who send you and your family loving thoughts and prayers each day.
peace, calmness and love in deep full breaths to you......and yours
Dear Sharyn, This is Chris James Mom from spaulding. I am so happy that Caleb is on the mend from recent hosp visit. I have to say you are the most koolest Mom. I would also like to say Thank you for reaching out to me one hurting Mom to another I was ready to break and you held me and let me cry you shared your strenth and I will be forever greatful.
James is well he is remarkable goes to rehab 4 days a week this will be his last week he returns to school this Wensday!!!
We went to see Dr Chea on Dec 7
two months after his being hit that he was just mistified by James recovery. Dr Chea said James you are a miracle go and live a good life give back to othere as you have a second chance.James does not remember the accdient, hosp or spaulding thank goodness but I will remember all my life what he went through.
What I will remember is the kindness of a loving woman who reached out to me and I thank you from the botton of my heart.I will remember where there is life there is hope. I will remember to look at my loved ones as if may be the last time we see them as they are.
Sending Caleb and you Dear Woman
healing loving prayers and that Caleb just contiues to get well.
Peace Chris
Hi Sharyn and clan,
Great to hear from you and great to hear Caleb is doing well. As many have told you, you are a phenomenal writer! Your thoughts on love and risk are so true. I have pondered what life would be like without our kids, never having to worry again about "what if" and a host of other things. But alas, it would not be worth anything with out them, even given our present circumstances!
I am out in AZ. tending to my failing Dad and am in a "catch 22" as to where to be, east or west.
Please know that I am thinking of you every day and say a prayer each night for you and your family and will continue to do so....Talk to you soon.Love, Julie,Court's Mom
FRIENDS ARE ANGELS WHO LIFT US TO OUR FEET WHEN OUR WINGS HAVE TROUBLE REMEMBERING HOW TO FLY.
You have a lot of friends Sharyn and we always love hearing from you. Daily prayers to Caleb.
J
What a beautiful post....thanks for sharing it with all of us in the blogosphere.
You sound like an amazing family and I wish you all the very best.
Hugs from Canada
mo & matt in nyc
It's a clear, perfect January day and we think of you and your family daily. Seeing the world in all it's beauty and pain - holding these truths within - you're becoming a conduit for that for me. This is what it means to be alive. Seeing Caleb's smile as he left the hospital and the fact that he did a "jig" - he's alive able to take in the world - what a gift!!!
Last night, our six year old son, Jonas awoke in the middle of the night and was unable to sleep because he kept worrying about whether people missed him before he was born? Did we even notice that he wasn't here...?
Somehow my son's anxieties shed light on the gift of Caleb's survival --
xoxoxo
Mo and Matt
As always, truly words to live by.
-P-town Girl
Mo and Matt,
I hope you will share with Jonas that the world may not have known who exactly was missing but we definitely missed his brightness, his curiosity, his kindness, his being and we are definitely glad that he is here. Our corner of the world is definitely brighter because of his presence.
Hey Sharon, I haven't written for a while because Haley says that what I write is depressing and I don't want to make life any harder for you. I spent sometime with my son Brad at a place called Erin Oak. It was a rehab facility, although Brad didn't really need rehab...he had never been ordinary...anyway I asked a worker there about what it was like to work with children, because it was a childrens' facility, who had ended up there because they had an injury. She told me that she concentrated on the present and what could be from this point on. She didn't deal with what could have been. Easy for her to say..
Ps...don't know why it posted as Bradley...maybe because he was setting up a facebook account. Even the unusual use face book....Suzanne
when it comes right down to it.....what else is there really in this life except to love and to be loved.
every moment imprinting on our open hearts.
it is the most beautiful and terrifying thing at the same time.
I so love you all here on this blogg. what is shared here has become part of my daily walk and practice in this world.
when my days are busy and stress filled I come home at the wee hours and get my dose of pure love and community. Thank you for that Sharyn and Caleb... and thank you to all who visit this blogg.
life is truly beautiful and every moment meant to be consumed as if it were our last.
This is such an amazing blog. Better than a shrink. Better than a shelf-help guide. Better than Dr. Phil!
Imagine what we could accomplish if we could bottle all this positive energy and ship it around the world!
Hope all is well with the Potter/Lindsay clan. You continue to be in my thoughts and prayers each and every day.
NY/Wellfleet mom
This truly made me cry buckets.My husband recently went through a mental breakdown of sorts and I really thought he wasn't coming back but somehow after a stay at a hospital and about two months of utter hell and emotional pain that I had no idea was possible he is back almost a hundred percent although he is still not ready to go back to work and I'm not sure I can either just yet.That statement about looking at our love ones as if might be the last time we see them as they are.Man did that hit home.I have been following Caleb's story since this blog has been up and it has really touched me and helped me in my own life.Thanks for sharing your lives it has helped me in ways I can't even explain.I just wish the best for you amazing people.Never give up.Things can get better.
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