Had a friend pop by tonight like a wonderfully, unexpected gift which appears on your table and brings with it a novel feeling...he caught me fresh out of the tub, wrapped in my leopard robe, and feeling still a bit drippy and vunerable...which was good because when he reminded me to stay in the present and not to give in to worry too much, if at all.... I was not in my usual guarded mind set...and I could "hear" him.
I recognized in his language what we all share.... this morose feeling of wanting to be separate - to know that "our troubles" are far worse than anyone else's troubles..no matter what they might be. We love to cling to the hot kettle, all the while that it is scalding us. Why don't we just let go? We like to feel important I guess, and if we can prove that we have it far worse than anyone else, well I guess that does the trick!
I have been suffering this week....but at this point I am aware of it, and being aware means that I have the power to exercise change over it ...and exorcise it!
Caleb continues to be my teacher. He remains steadfast, kind, positive, knowing, and complete.
I am honored to be his chosen mother.
It is a different household now without the "girls" We are down to one and I miss the constant female energy of Lizzy and Jennie. They are both doing so well in their new places in the city. I am most pleased to be getting to know the new kid on the block Lara.. she is a delight.
We are making our way through the fall with courage and I have an unequaled desire to be just like everyone else -- just normal---full of pains and misery at times and full of laughter and light at others.
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On the fourth of July, 2007 Caleb Potter was involved in a skateboarding accident.
He suffered serious injuries and continues to need all of our positive thoughts and prayers.
This blog is to serve as a space for updates on Caleb's journey of recovery.
He suffered serious injuries and continues to need all of our positive thoughts and prayers.
This blog is to serve as a space for updates on Caleb's journey of recovery.
Adding Comments
Please feel free to add your comments to the blog. All you have to do is click on the number of comments at the bottom of one of the postings. Then write your comment in the box provided on the right side of the screen. Thank you to all of you who have been commenting so far; we're creating quite the community on here! Be well...
A BIG Thank You
In this season of giving thanks and celebrating family togetherness, I wish to extend a warm thank you to everyone who has been involved in a myriad of ways with my son, Caleb Potter, and his recovery. On July 4, he was involved in a skateboarding accident in our little hometown of Wellfleet on Cape Cod, that caused him serious injuries. He came home from Spaulding Rehab in Boston just before Thanksgiving. Through the blog we started:
http://calebpotter.blogspot.com/
the Wellfleet community of support stretched far and wide across the country, and in fact, throughout parts of the world, with many people offering prayers and words of wisdom. We could not have come so far without this legion of support from all of you, in Wellfleet and beyond. We are sincerely grateful.
Sharyn L. Lindsay and family
http://calebpotter.blogspot
the Wellfleet community of support stretched far and wide across the country, and in fact, throughout parts of the world, with many people offering prayers and words of wisdom. We could not have come so far without this legion of support from all of you, in Wellfleet and beyond. We are sincerely grateful.
Sharyn L. Lindsay and family
DONATIONS
THE CALEB POTTER
BENEFIT FUND
Donations may be made in person at any branch of Cape Cod Five Cents Savings Bank or mailed to the bank at P.O. Box 697, Wellfleet, MA 02667.
Thank you SO MUCH
for your contributions.
With love,
from all of Caleb's friends and family
BENEFIT FUND
Donations may be made in person at any branch of Cape Cod Five Cents Savings Bank or mailed to the bank at P.O. Box 697, Wellfleet, MA 02667.
Thank you SO MUCH
for your contributions.
With love,
from all of Caleb's friends and family
Official Information
If you have questions about calebpotter.blogspot.com,
email Sky at:
novembersky.freysscole@gmail.com
email Sky at:
novembersky.freysscole@gmail.com
For Sending Cards etc.
Caleb Potter
c/o Sharyn Lindsay
45 Sapokonish Way
Wellfleet, MA
02667
(please be respectful)
c/o Sharyn Lindsay
45 Sapokonish Way
Wellfleet, MA
02667
(please be respectful)
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13 comments:
Sharyn,
Thank you for sharing your wonderful boys with me on Saturday. I was such a pleasure to be welcomed into your special world. The warmth of your home was like strong arms around me when I needed them, and I never realized that you were suffering so. You listened, smiled and gave me hope for my friend Jayne, that still lies in a coma. By hearing about her tragedy, you helped to relieve some of my troubles although it must have made you re-live your heartbreak of Caleb's long sojourn. I felt a bond that afternoon, and hope to be once again sitting at your table. Caleb is amazing. Yes, he is a different Caleb now to you, but what a magical essence he has! A special tribe, all of you.
Thank you for being there for me.
so good to hear from you.... i was worried.
i am always thinking of all of you
amy in ct
Sharyn,
Give up on the thought of ever being "normal"!
After 30+ years of knowing you there is no hope of that for you!!
Thank God!
I'm honored to be your friend...
Kevin
Always thinking of you and your boys here in Norton, MA.
Sharyn,
I knew something was going on for you.....glad you checked in with us! (can't find your email -you have mine)!
YOU ARE just a "normal" person - going through some particularly awful and life altering shit (can we say that here?)
I met you, I FELT you - you're NORMAL!!!!
Or as close to it as I like people to be!!(smile)
Hang in Sharyn -Caleb really IS still so very special, I told you I could sense it from the 5 seconds I met him for.....it's there, i don't think it can be taken from him.... there's much more to come,some good stuff,I'm sure....(remember,he just came home last winter)-hold on and ride the waves.....
We will ride beside you, UP and DOWN - and remember, we are riding those waves in our own worlds and dealing with various griefs and situations. I say that only to remind you that you that you're less alone than you may feel at times.....I NEVER pretend to feel your pain - only to empathize,as a Mom, a woman, a friend....I looked into your tear filled eyes and mine filled instantly as well....I don't KNOW your pain,but I can feel FOR you...and for Caleb,(and Max and Kai) and for what was lost on that awful day..... I wish I could touch your hand lightly each day and let you feel my support and caring and constant prayers...but I think you know they are there - and coming continuously, from so many...
I've got an awful head cold and fear I'm babbling -enough for now-
Light and love,as always-
NY -Nancy
I had a feeling you were struggling this past week, and sent out a few extra positive thoughts your way...I agree with Kevin that being normal is highly over-rated, but I do know what you are saying.....but living in the moment is your best defense against the blues....and remembering that we are right beside you ready to walk with you on your journey or to just prop you up to weather the storms. You are not alone even when you are.....
As always, with hope,
peg from PA
Sharyn, be gentle with yourself and know that in those quiet alone hours of the night good thoughts are being carried to you by the sea breezes from many directions.
Very early this morning as I was out in the dark staring at the full moon, the air was still, the day not even born, all was quiet and peaceful. Nothing needed doing,no worries, no concerns. In the soft shadows all seemed right. The world seemed still and fine. The harsh light of day had not arrived.
It is that thought that I wish for you. That when you are in a place of hurting from that scalding kettle that you can put it down and escape and be at a place of peace.
Hello Sharyn, Tonight found me at 7th grade parents night going through my daughters schedule and meeting all her teachers each for a 10 min class. First was the very pregnant english teacher that assured us she would be back in January, then the french teacher who told us she would not only be their teacher this year, but next. The science teacher also teaching 7th and 8th grade saying we would know her for a long time. I watched as all other parents nodded in agreement, but I kept thinking "How do you know? " After my sister's sudden death I no longer can think this way. Knowing the sudden, the unexpected can happen changes you forever, of that I am sure, whether this change is good or bad I do not yet know. I was afraid for these nodding, believing parents and jealous of them at the same time. After Maria died I was reading about the loss processes and on quote really hit home, it said, "You will find strangers in friends and friends in strangers" We all have our roads we must travel and travelers we can meet along the way, and as hard as this has been it has brought me places I had never even imagined before. Peace and love fellow traveler, Laura
I'm happy that Lizzie and Jennie are moving on and starting their life in the city, but I'm sure the change impacts your family different than most. Change, that is something you have to embrace and deal with on a daily basis. I would find it hard, but others would find it exciting and fun.
Find the balance that works for you Sharyn, you are stronger than most and you will survive.
I hope that each day you do one thing for yourself. One thing that you loved before the accident that keeps you sane.
Get together with your girlfriends, you have such a strong core of good people around you. Get out, stretch, move, and feel the sunlight on your face.
Peace,
J
Hi Sharyn,
Thank you for coming back to us.I check daily for an update as your words of wisdom and reflections on the commonalities we share always give me a unique perspective on my own situation.
I have just come from Boston Children's Hospital where my 4 year old had her quarterly MRI to see if her brain tumor has grown, shrunk or remained the same. Your words were with me through the halls. Of this notion of people in turmoil wanting to be separate and alone in their unique situations. I always come away from those visits and the follow up we will have next week at Dana Farber feeling incredibly lucky. For all of our troubles, we are all incredibly lucky. For there are those whose suffering, whose loss, whose illness is always worse than what we face.I don't think any of us who read and comment in this community, who have our own hardships would have trouble finding someone with whom we would never want to trade places. That doesn't mean that what we are going through doesn't suck (I think we can say that here) because it does suck. It sucks that Caleb had that accident, it sucks that Lucy has a brain tumor, it sucks that Miriam's partner (I think it is her partner) had that crash, it sucks that that other woman's friend had such a bad accident...it all sucks. And yet, we are not alone, we are not separate. We are learning to connect and to trade pain for pain and look back within and say, "my stuff sucks and someone's stuff sucks and yet someone else who I pass in the hallway at Dana Farber, or Children's or Caleb's Rehab..that person's stuff sucks even worse than mine.
So in your effort to be separate, you have done exactly the opposit. You have drawn us together. You have created community that started with you and your need to keep people informed, create an outlet for your pain and to generously allow people into your world. But you are really giving and doing so much more. I find that the people in this community are very giving of spirit and we come here to care, to heal and to shoulder...even shoulder for perfect strangers. That is a very big idea and to me very powerful...I feel like you are the Pied Piper of Good Vibes. And we need more of that in this complex and often unforgiving world.
So keep piping and I will keep humming along.
Gratefully,
Risa
Have I ever said I love this place?
I think once or twice - but I'll say it again -
What a magical,spiritual space......
smiles and warm hugs from New York
Nancy
Thinking of you.
NY/Wellfleet Mom
Hi Sharyn,
It never ceases to amaze me .... what happens to our own lives when we reach out and help others.
You have touched so many lives by sharing your story and journey.
Thinking of all of you today,
marcia
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