Jan's anniversary always hangs heavily over us.
I came across an article printed shortly after Caleb's accident where Jan was quoted saying " we expect a full recovery" and I was astonished with his directness and his confidence in Caleb. Where I have faultered and lost my way so many times over the past years...he, on some level, was convinced that Caleb would be fine.
I sat in bed late night, last night pondering this and have come to the conclusion that Jan's strength has asked of me to reconsider my position, to look at my lack of faith ..and to turn it around. That quote has made me realize how much I fret, how much I worry, how much I fear..and in doing so, am I not really attesting to a lost faith in Caleb?
So today I have made up my mind to trust the process, to think outside of the box, to really believe in this boy whom I love and know well enough to know that he, and he alone possesses the ability to heal..and I need only to get out of his way.
Thank you Jan! God Bless.

Finally a moment to catch up with you . Caleb and I hit the ground running when we got back from Portsmouth. Spring is in the air...and so, so very much to do. First of all my cutting garden. Long Pond Farm is the chosen name..and I thank you for all the wonderful, interesting thoughts on what to call it, but this resonated with me. But the best part is that I have decided to try to put together a house full of Brain Injured people in what was once my home, so that Caleb will have a social structure and a life that does not always include just me. This inspiration came from a young man who used to work for me long ago who stopped me in the street and gave me a beautifully carved sign which read... The Potter's room. It was a "sign" to me. A room for Mr. Potter and all who would join him on this new life adventure. So ..we will kick off a celebration...I think on Caleb's birthday.... May 31st to try to raise money for a car which can transport many.. through the many efforts of my friends . A yard sale is in order - perhaps you have something you would donate...that chair in the basement you no longer need..a collection of old bottles, a vase from grandma that you feel guilty about parting with, but secretly hate...I hope to see all of you from near -- or far. I am totally excited about this "life after death" feeling which has been creeping up on us, promising a better life for all under this roof. I will keep you posted...while you hopefully can collect items for our sale! Love ya, S